In honor of fall pertaining to conserve us from our slim suffering (horrible however hot), here’ s a list of our preferred foods that we can consume shamelessly once again, now that sweatshirt weather condition is upon us.
1. French Fries
Fuck, french fries are so great, you men. Like, we’ ve taken a starchy veggie suggested to tide over Irish peasants in winter season, fried it, and topped it with salt and like, more fat. The outcome is an unholy abomination and curse upon humanity, probs singlehandedly accountable for the weight problems epidemic in America. It tastes very great and you can have it once again.
Like sex, pizza readies even when it isn’ t excellent. Carbohydrates plus cheese plus very little veggie invasion seems like an excellent 400+ calorie meal to me. As an adult, you ought to have the ability to round off a whole pie on your own. Now that summertime is over, you can practice once again.
3. Cheese In All Forms
How could cheese NOT be on this list? I presume, like me, you’ ve all been preventing the expensive cheese area at the supermarket all summertime. Now that we can cover ourselves in shapeless sweatshirts and sweatpants, cheese go back to our lives like an on-again, off-again fuckboy. Artisan cheddar, velvety gouda, tasty blue– we enjoy you all and welcome you into our hearts … and arteries.
4. Apple Pie With Crumbly Topping
Apple pie is excellent. Apple pie topped with that crusty, sweet, crispy brown sugar topping is even much better. Yeah, it absolutely raises the calories for a regular apple pie by like double, however can you put a number on joy? You can’ t.
5. Tater Tots
You understand exactly what are even much better than french fries? Tater kids. Weighing in at more calories than we care to reveal, these fluffy balls of potato are fantastic by themselves, covered in cheese, or as a base for tater kid nachos. There’ s no god.
6. Taco Bell
If you put on ’ t like Taco Bell, then fuck you. Truthfully, this is the king of all junk food facilities and tastes remarkable whether you ’ re hungover, very high, or simply had a shitty day. Absolutely nothing fills the stubborn belly rather like a Quesarito– a lot so that we forget that a Quesarito is not a real food product and has no company existing. Taco Bell simply does that for us– it makes pretending alright and makes calories not harm so bad.
Is there anything that makes you better than carbohydrates covered in a blanket of sauce, covered in a blanket of melted cheese? Me either, which is v depressing however we can ’ t enter into that now. Fall is the perf season to carbo-load, and pasta is the supreme response.
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